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Famous Actress always has "free tickets" in her contract. This means that she can use them to fly herself or a friend back and forth between home and film set. On the film she was presently shooting she had used most of her tickets. She had only one more left.
She called me one morning and asked how many she had left. I told her one. She told me that she was going to give it to her makeup artist to use. Makeup Artist had a personal thing and needed to return home for the weekend. I told her I would take care of it.
As I'm planning Makeup Artists's travel with the studio travel person, Asshole Midget comes into my office and listens. This doesn't really bother me; sometimes he likes hanging out in my office. But when I finish the arrangements and hang up, he asks me what I'm doing.
"I'm doing travel for Makeup Artist." "Why are you doing it with the studio travel person?" "Because Famous Actress gave her one of her studio tickets." "How many more tickets does Famous Actress have left?" "None now." "Well then Makeup Artist can't use that ticket. That's my ticket to go visit Famous Actress on the set." Huh? These are tickets for Famous Actress to use. If she wants to give one to Makeup Artist, isn't that her choice? But I don't say that. Instead I ask him how he wants me to handle this.
"Do you have Famous Actress's credit card number?" "Yes I do." "Charge it to that." I tell him that I won't do that without her permission. He flies into tirade - Why did I tell her that she had one more ticket left?
"Well, because she called and asked." Asshole Midget calls Famous Actress and tells her that she doesn't have any more tickets, that I was wrong. Famous Actress is clearly confused but also recognizes that something is going on here.
'Why would you even think that you had any more tickets?" he asks her. She is baffled now, but clearly gets the feeling that I am about to get in trouble. But she also knows that I'm right - after all, why would I lie to her about the tickets? Her reply to Asshole Midget is, "Because I usually get a certain number." He presses her: "But who told you that?" "No one told me that, I thought it was a precedent from my last film." Even I am a little confused. I told him what I had told her. But he trying to get her to incriminate me in this Airline Ticket Plot. She never once mentions my name to him.
I'm outraged. Asshole Midget is trying to make me look like an idiot. He is fucking over a client and the fact that he would even suggest that I charge something to a client's credit card without permission? I am grateful to Famous Actress for trying to keep me out of trouble. I call her when I get home. "Thank you," I say. "And I'm not crazy. You do have another ticket left, but I guess I can't help you with travel." She tells me that she figured out he was lying because he was so angry about it all. She says not to worry - that she will handle the ticket thing. And she does. She does the travel herself with the studio travel person. Asshole Midget has to pay for his own ticket when he goes to visit her on set. But he never mentions the ticket thing to me again.
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